Random Blue Bird Droppings

Perhaps it's just me, but last night's 4-3 loss to the Baltimore Orioles seemed every bit as tantalizingly exciting as a three hour documentary on paint drying.

Tonight's game isn't shaping up to be much more of a thrill ride either as Steve Trachsel prepares to lead his Orioles against Shaun Marcum and the Toronto Blue Jays. On many occasions, Trachsel has suffered the embarrassment of having fans fall asleep in the stands while he pitches. However, this isn't nearly as embarrassing as Josh Towers, who on many occasions has suffered the indignity of having fans awake while he pitches.

Thank you, I'll be here all week.

Millar Time

Kevin Millar drove in the first three Oriole runs of the game last night, and while I recognize the sacrilege in being a fan boy for a player on the opposing team, Millar remains one of my favourites in baseball.

If you go to enough games at the Rogers Centre, you're sure to run into a rather large figure named Andrew who sits behind the visitor's bullpen. I'm sure we've written about the fella before, but I'm too lazy to look it up.

Anyway, in addition to his obesity, Andrew is infamous for his love of the Baltimore Orioles. When the Orange Birds come to town, you can expect to hear him hollering from the outfield seats his greetings to his favourite players during play, "Hello Kevin Millar! Hello Nick Markakis! Hello Brian Roberts!" While memorable, it gets rather annoying quickly.

Anyway, on a game day last year, before fans had entered the stadium, A.J. Burnett, that beacon of humanity, was making his way to the Jays bullpen when his stroll was interrupted by hollering in a retardo voice, "Hello A.J. Burnett!"

Burnett, surprised, turns toward the Orioles bullpen to see Kevin Millar standing on the seats and mocking every one's favourite Rogers Centre mental disability.

Tweakers

As previously mentioned, Rod Barajas tweaked his groin in front of a stadium full of people on Sunday (and I've heard that shit just doesn't fly in Texas), but according to John Gibbons he won't miss any time on the DL and was available off the bench last night.

Additionally, it's being reported that Armando Benitez tweaked his thigh while pitching in Syracuse. Somehow, I'm confident that the minor injury will not affect his appetite . . . for striking out batters.

Leyland Flips

Detroit Tigers manager Jim Leyland finally flipped out at his team on Sunday, calling on them to Man Up, and do a bunch of other cliched things. According to at least one Wilner blog commenter, this makes him a great manager in comparison to John Gibbons.

Leyland also wrote an angry message on the clubhouse white board that was full of four letter words, but he erased and replaced most of them with even smaller words so that Gary Sheffield could still understand.

Secret, Secret, I've Got A Secret

I've heard from some nameless unreliable sources, likely the same that Marty York cites, that tickets for the World Baseball Classic will be the same price as regular Jays games. However, the best seats will likely only be available as part of package deals for all the games at Rogers Centre, so that you can't only purchase tickets to the Canada vs. U.S.A. game.

Rolen Rolen Rolen

After meeting with the digit doctor in Baltimore, Scott Rolen met up with his Blue Jays teammates, to whom he's been estranged since almost knocking off the tip of his middle finger
during a fielding drill.

Due to Mighty Joe Inglett's continued performances in Rolen's absence, Rolen's wife remains the only one upset at the third baseman's debilitating injury.

Hockey Talk

Everyone was going all ape goof over Sean Avery's diversionary tactics against Martin Brodeur the other day. Humourously, the New York Times compares the strategy to the Alex Rodriguez Bush League psych-out bullshit he pulled out against the Jays last season. The NHL remains grateful just to be talked about.

The Punchline I Wanted To Use But Couldn't Find A Reason To

An awkward moment occurred on Aaron Hill's honeymoon when he had to explain to his new wife that it wasn't the first time he wore a number two on his back.