White Sox Bats Disappear Down Long Dark Hole

In preparation for yesterday afternoon's 4-3 loss to the Toronto Blue Jays, the Chicago White Sox created an installation art piece in the visitors locker room. Like me, they seem to reserve a special place in their hearts for artistic erotica.

According to Robert MacLeod of the Globe and Mail, a couple blow up dolls "were surrounded by the game bats that the White Sox were going to use later on that day against the Blue Jays. One of the bats was inserted in a delicate spot, but the doll didn't seem to mind. “You've Got To Push” read a sign one of the dolls was holding. “Let's Go White Sox,” said another."

I imagine that reporters were most shocked to see that White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen barely noticed the R-rated display that his players had created. If he was asked about his non-reaction, I'm sure he would've mentioned that upon seeing the blow up dolls in a compromising situation he just assumed he was walking into his living room . . . or his bedroom . . . or his bathroom . . . or his pantry.

Guillen went on an obscenity-laced tirade following the Sox fifth straight loss (three in a row to the Blue Jays) yesterday, after a reporter jokingly suggested he promote a Single A player who recently had a multi-home run game in the Minors.

The Chicago Tribune has a myriad of Guillen's quotes from the outburst, but instead of quoting him word for word, they literally put "[bleep]" in the place of his obscenities. I understand that certain publications may have more prudish readerships than a blog called Drunk Jays Fans, but [bleep]? Wouldn't "[expletive]" be more appropriate?

Bleep seems childish and reminds me of the time our mother misguidedly tried to get my brother, sister and I to replace the term "fart" with "traf" which is just "fart" backwards. Even at seven years old, I knew that move was total bull[bleep].

Speaking of blow up dolls, Jesse Litsch is actually left-handed when it comes to everything but pitching.