Saturday Game Threat: Jays (42-39) vs. Dickfucks (46-33)

I'd be a hypocrite to take up too much of your time here. I gotta head out and frankly so do you. It's a beautiful day outside and you should drag your ass out there to enjoy at least one cold beverage in the sun. Sure, I'd like to watch the game. But sometimes, three hours of our life spent in the dark while there's cleavage to be seen outside can be a bit sad. The Blue Jays have been taking up enough of our time and mental stability lately, we all deserve a quick victory.

Joe Girardi, Halladay likes to get things done quickly. There'll be none of this runs scored on walks nonsense going on today. He doesn't appreciate waiting while you futilely go to the mound and change pitchers in hopes of trying to improve the situation. The man has told his wife, Brandy, that catching a matinee show at 3 p.m. today shouldn't be a problem. And it really shouldn't. Just send Josh Towers Chien-Wing Wang out there today and once we score a run on him just concede that this one's not going anywhere.

As the Post's Jeremy Sandler rightfully points out, things aren't looking so rosy for the Jays after yesterday's heartwrecker. Three games above .500. We're seven games back of the Red Sox. And Cito is summing up the first half of the season as "average."

But you know what, we're five games back of the Yankees, current Wild Card leader. So it's simple really, just beat the shit out of the Yankees the next three games and get back in this thing. It's almost too easy. Get 'er started, Doc.

Go Jays!

P.S. How about Wells going 2-4 with a double and dinger hitting in sixth? Playoffs!